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Prelude to a Lick

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Not an everyday outfit; it's a Brazilian futebol shirt and shorts that Phoebe thought would be fly on Chet, the doggie Pele. He planted his feet and refused to move until he was de-costumed.

Chet Baker had the most marvelous time at the
New River Birding and Nature Festival last week. It was his third New River appearance. He was meeter/greeter at Opossum Creek Retreat and he dove into his role. He also took it upon himself to discipline and corral four golden retriever x beagle pups who showed up at Opossum Creek needing food and love. Offisa Pupp rounded them up time and again, then came back to his real job, which is kissing people and sitting on their laps allowing them to massage him. Chet is truly wonderful in a crowd. His love gets spread around enough so that no one person ever gets overwhelmed. But when there's only one guest, he can take the greeting ritual a bit too far.

We’re working on helping Chet Baker be more polite to newly arrived guests, but that sudden spring-loaded French kiss of his is proving hard to quell.
He can launch himself from a sitting start straight up in the air four feet and get his tongue waaay into a visitor’s aghast mouth faster than you can say AGGH! Guests settle into two groups: those who like it and laugh uproariously, getting down on their haunches to facilitate the orgy of kisses; and those who make spluttering noises and wipe their mouths with the back of their hands while making an awful tragic-comic face. Kissing is something that Boston terriers do, and they like to kiss right on the lips. Sometimes I wonder if the breed is being actively selected for this trait; they are so devoted to it. Kissing is to Bostons as tolling ducks is to the Duck-tolling Retriever. This behavior is proving intractable doubtless because the kids and I love Chet kisses and ask for them, so how can we help him understand that guests might not?

I will kiss you

And kiss you again.

You may feel free to give advice on this vice of his, as long as you don’t suggest I start clicker training or take him to obedience school, because I’m too lazy for both those things and I pretty much adore him just the way he is. I figure there ought to be a way to switch him to polite mode, but the natural enthusiasm of a Boston terrier for lusty greetings is a force of nature right up there with those geysers that spurt up out of Yellowstone Park every hour on the hour. Ol’ Irrepressible.

While speaking to the Toledo Naturalists’ Association this winter, I had the pleasure of staying with my friend Diane, an insanely smart, capable woman who is looking to launch a new career having something to do with one or both of her twin passions: nature and healthy food. She’s willing to relocate and ready to rock. She’s open to collaboration, has a big dollop of entrepreneurial spirit, and I put this out into the universe because I would like to help her find her joy, and also because she was such a gracious hostess and model for the following little Chetshoot. Leave me a comment at juliezickefoosedotcom if you have ideas for Diane.

Oh, Mether, I hate good-byes. Diane has been so good to us and now we have to go home. I think you are mean to make me leave. She has bunnehs in her backyard who do not yet know how to outsmart me, Chet Baker.

If we must go, I will give Diane a good-bye kiss.

A little one, on the cheek, because we have already met and besides I am sad.

Whut? Doesn’t everyone love Chet Baker kisses?

Mether, cover me up for the long ride home. Know that you will never train the kisses out of me. I was made to love.


Please don't even try to change Chet's super-enthusiastic greetings! Like teaching pigs to sing, it will waste your time and annoy Mr. Baker. Instead, how about a large sign near your door: "Beware of dog...kisses!"

Get him a tag that says: "Can't hold my licker"

"People have the dog they want." This is my firm belief. If you want a dog who French kisses everyone, including people who don't like to be kissed, then don't change the dog, change your friends.


Note: I did not say anything about the dumb outfit you inflicted on Chet. I can no longer say anything about clothes on dogs, because I personally own three items of doggy clothing for a puppy I still haven't met. I have gone over to the Dark Side.


If Bella or Chloe didn't try to slip me their tongue, I'd think they were ill. Prelude to a Lick series of photos is PRICELESS!

Floods in TN., terrorism in NY, and possibly the biggest ecological disaster of my lifetime in the Gulf... thank goodness for Chet posts (just what I needed!)

Why not just tell the nonkissers to turn around as Chet launches so he has only their backs to attack! -- if they can be fast enough.
Personally I'm for the kisses.
A friend once kept trying to calm my Boston by putting her hands on her and I kept explaining she really needed to just ignore the dog. Impossible to train people! So once the excited dog just peed on her bare feet in fancy sandals!!!! Some people never learn!

Posted by Anonymous May 6, 2010 at 1:36 PM

I'd have to paint myself in gravy to get a kiss out of old Flounder, but Bear is a kissin' machine.

That Chet ...

I'm somewhere in between and worried that I'd be a poor guest if I revealed myself to be a wiper. I'm a wiper. The kisses are fine but then I wipe. I apologize for that. Kitties don't have so much liquid in 'em, so I'm out of practice.

Oh Murr, wiping is fine! Chet embarrasses me sometimes. And I have to wipe the underneath-tongue kisses off, too. Bleh.

Them things is hyper!!!!

Wouldn't have him any other way.
But yes, I'm a wiper too. There's much...hanging...from my chin...

Who wouldn't want to be kissed by Chet? Send me your address, I'm coming for kisses!

My Boston Logan is an incorrigible kisser and I encourage it. What I don't enjoy is when he tries to clean my nostrils. They get irritated. Still damn funny!

Posted by btmom May 6, 2010 at 9:05 PM


I adore him, regardless!

Love the doggeh kisses! Thanks for the "Chetfix":)

Oh, if only you could package his love and licker and send it to DC! In fact you could make millions selling it--"Baker Balm, available at drugstores nationwide"

Julie, I love my chetfixes and this one especially! I am a boston owner myself, and I LOVE how you portray exactly the mind of a boston! if you ever travel through Georgia, let me know- i would love for Chet and my Lily to have a playdate!

Cutest. Pup. Ever.

(Wish my dog was a licker! She's too snooty...)

So how about 2 lines at the event's Welcome Station: "This Line for Doggie Welcome Kisses" and "Regular Boring Check-In Line."

I love the Diane series of pics. Is that the cutest damn dog or what?

Still waiting for my kiss.

OMG, that first picture made me snort! Sooooo funny!
I love your blog (and hubby's too)
I have had so many smiles and giggles from reading your blog. Thanks :)

Cat tongues I can handle; dog tongues not so much... but I'd sure like to vigorously rub noses with the Bacon (I'd just have to hold his jaws shut while I did it!).

Remember the day when a visitor to your house had to leave their well behaved beloved dogs home?

I'm so glad you've found doggie love.
It suits you.

Now about our snake?

True friend, Diane. She gamely resists the ' . . wipe their mouths with the back of their hands while making an awful tragic-comic face' - mode.

I love dogs more than . . oops. More than . . . ummm . . ok: ice cream.

But every time they go for the throat swabbing I keep remembering the places those tongues have been.


Don't break Chet of the habit. We squeamish need to be reminded that love like life -
is inexorably, delightfully messy.

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