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A New Way to Trim Dog Toenails!

Thursday, May 9, 2013

If you're anything like me, you purely HATE trimming your dog's nails. Because there's the yipping, and the snarling, and the wiggling, and the dread, and the procrastination, and sometimes there's even the blood. We hate the blood. And then there's the styptic, and sometimes there's even the making little booties out of paper towels and duct tape so he doesn't leave roses all over the carpet. Ugh, ugh, ugh. If they could just make a dog with self-trimming toenails.

Well. It turns out that all you have to do is put a chipmunk up on a cinder block under a flower pot.

I was working in the studio when Phoebe looked out the window and asked, "WTH is Chet doing?"

Hm. It seems he has a chiptymunk up under that flowerpot.

He dug and dug. He lay on his side and dug. 

He faced her head-on and dug.

He gave us the stink-eye for laughing at him. Asking why we didn't come out and lift that pot up and let him at the chiptymunk. It is just like a dog to enlist help from humans with a direct stare. We didn't cave.

Because I've fallen for that request before, Chet Baker, and you were on that poor panicked fleeing chiptymunk like the white on rice and you pounced on him, gave him one shake and lay him down. That's why I'm not going to help you. No way, Jose. That's just being an accomplice to the rat terrier half of you, and I'm not doing that. Even if the damn little things killed another of my American chestnuts this spring, digging it up looking for the nut they already took off it last spring, and leaving me with three, only two of which are even viable. Durn chipmunks.

You just try to get in there yourself.

So all the while those little paws with their overgrown nails are digging and scraping against that rough cinder block. 

Come on. Just stop laughing, get out here and help me get this chiptymunk out.

No. You keep it up. I was going to have to ask Bill to weedwhack all that creeping Charlie, and now I won't. Because you are doing a fabulous job of clearing it out. Well done, Terrier. Well done.

I didn't realize until after Chet had given up and flopped down on the sunwarmed sidewalk that he'd done a real number on his front paws. His nails were shorter than they'd been since he was a pup! Down past the quick they were, and no bleeding. Wow.

You have nicely trimmed nails and a dirty nose, Chet Baker. And you are very very tired.

You have a well-developed prey drive, and a penchant for rodents. 

If I catch this squirtle, will you make Brunswick stew with it? I would like that.

You bet, Chet Baker. I will. When you catch that squirtle. And I will look in Joy of Cooking and see if you can make Brunswick stew with chiptymunks. I am sure you can substitute three chiptymunks for one squirtle. Or some such.

So go get you a cinder block, two flowerpots and a chiptymunk, and you will never have the dread, the trimming, the yipping, the snarling, the blood or the paper towel and duct tape booties again.


Aww, man! If only it would work on that gnarly dewclaw!!!

Dang! If only that would work on the gnarly puppeh dewclaws!

Do you suppose he would dig that hard and long for a few bikkits hidden under there? Maybe a juicy hunk of steak hidden under there? You'll have to try it next time his nails need a trim!

Man, that is some serious stinkeye that he is throwing your way! Of course, there are still the back feet, but at least half the work is done! If only that would work with parrot nails. Alas, though...

1. We don't have chipmunks, only squirrels.

2. The birds have no predatory instinct for rodents. They, in point of fact, do the avian equivalent of standing on a chair and screaming when they see a rodent.

3. They will dig, but only newspaper on the bottom of the cage, and it is bollocks at keeping nails trimmed.

Ah, well. Guess I just have to do the clipper thing....

Dremel tool--that's what you need. A little whirring rotating file and--PRESTO--all done.
Of course, I've never done it myself--just watched it being done.
As for us, we chicken out and take our dog (and kitties) to our local pet groomer. Plop them critters down, and they get bathed and clipped (just the dog for that) and clipped (the kitties).

Nice, but that only works for the front claws and not the dew claw. When I lived in Washington State and my Lab ran after me on my bike, her claws were worn down wonderfully short and on all four feet.

Seriously, get yourself a Dremel. That's how I do Sam's claws. You'll have to fight the first few times, but then he'll figure it out and just lay there with a minimal amount of wriggling.

Laugh at a dog who can administer stink-eye at your own risk Zick...


Posted by Anonymous May 9, 2013 at 1:27 PM

that is some serious stinkeye that he is throwing your way! Of course, there are still the back feet, but at least half the work is done! If only that would work with parrot runescape gold

Did that chiptymnk give its distress call ? ; )

Posted by Weedpullr May 10, 2013 at 6:57 AM

I find it easiest to cut dog toenails often and remove very little. The hardest part is getting long toenails back short.

But cut them after a run and also use a food reward. And try not to hold the feet too tightly. I managed to get my daughter's lab to accept toilnail cutting with these tricks. On some dogs, I just cut one toenail every day. Then two per day and work up to all 20 a day. Remember dew claws so they don't get long.

Or just keep lots of chipmunks on hand.

What a great story! And well told as usual. Thanks, Julie! And you have a lot of rat terrier in you, Mr. Chet Baker. Go, Chet, Go!!

Great story, made me laugh out loud & then had to read it to my partner. The photos are priceless!

I never would have thought of this! Thanks for sharing this great idea :)

Wow that's a great idea, pretty fun for the dog and entertaining too! Definitely going to try this will let you know if it works.

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